(Or, how to bathe your pet chicken)

She caught me. Yep, I tried to keep it all under the radar, but my Mom was too sharp for me.

What’d she catch me doing? Well, you’d have thought she‘d caught me in the act of doing drugs or something equally nefarious, but no, she caught me preparing to give my pet chicken, Penny, a bath in the kitchen sink.

In my Mother’s mind, the only chicken that belonged in the kitchen was the one that was frying in the pan or baking in the oven.

I explained . . .

Penny, my white Silkie hen was going to the fair . . . to be judged. And, hopefully, to win a high ranking ribbon. Cleanliness being next to godliness, and all, she had to be bathed, and the kitchen was the only ideal place to do it.

I cajoled . . .

The kitchen sink outranked the bathtub because of the double sink, making a thorough rinsing possible. She wouldn't have to even look at any chicken poop! I'd clean the kitchen afterward from top to bottom. Besides, she surely didn't want little Penny to catch a cold. It was too chilly to bathe her outside.

I was about to conjure up a tear or two, but . . .

With a disgruntled sigh, Mom finally agreed, providing I promised to clean up afterward . . . with plenty of disinfectant.

Since I followed through, every fair season that followed, bathing the chickens I’d selected to exhibit became a “normal” and fairly well tolerated routine.

You see, Penny won that year. Grand Champion, too. Meaning, I proudly brought Penny home along with a rather nice trophy. Beginner’s luck, I guess.

So, how in the world do you bathe a pet chicken?

Well, I followed the instructions given by my 4-H leader, Mrs. Swanson, when I bathed Penny. I was kind of nervous, seeing as how it was a first for both me and little Penny.

1.) I filled the left side of the kitchen sink with warm water (about 95 degrees F) and a little Ivory Liquid soap (baby shampoo is great, too) before going out to get Penny.

2.) I held her in the palm of my left hand, holding her wing tip with my thumb and fourth finger and immersed her in the water.

3.) Then I soaked all her feathers thoroughly, applying the liquid soap to dirty spots and rubbing her feathers gently in the direction of the natural grain. Her legs were a little dirty, so I used an old soft toothbrush and gently cleaned them with it.

4.) In the right side of the sink I ran a warm water rinse, adding about a quarter cup of white vinegar to it (this helps cut the soap and makes the feathers shiny) before transferring her to that tub.

5.) While she was in the first rinse tub, I pulled the stopper in the left side where I'd washed her with the soap, let it drain out, sprayed it until the water was free of bubbles, then filled it with plain water for the second rinse. I added a bit of bluing agent to highlight her white feathers.

6.) I let her soak in each rinse for about two minutes then moved her gently from side to side while directing the water away from the grain of the feathers.

7.) When I was satisfied she was thoroughly rinsed, I removed her from the sink, wrapped her carefully in a terrycloth towel and gently blotted her.

8.) I used a hair dryer set on low heat to dry her completely, then using an old silk scarf of my Mom’s (you bet I asked her first!) I stroked her feathers ‘til they were so shiny I could practically see my own reflection.

9.) I used just a tiny bit of mayonnaise to rub on her legs, comb, and face. This makes them shiny. Some people swear by vaseline, or olive oil instead, but I prefer the mayonnaise. Either way, you'll want to blot off the excess afterward.

That was it, she was ready to go to the fair! I put her in a separate pen with soft clean bedding until time to transfer her to her carrier on the big day.

Contrary to what you might think, chickens like their baths. Out in their pens, they love to take dust baths, burrowing in the dirt and sometimes staying there for quite awhile. It gets rid of any mites they may have. Of course, it's one responsibility of their owner to examine and treat them and their living space for mites periodically, too.

Chickens also "preen" themselves. They each have a gland, called the Uropygial Gland, which secretes semisolid fatty substances. They use their beaks to spread these secretions over all their feathers. This keeps their feathers flexible and shiny.